You can judge me all you like
But back then in boarding school,
Most times when others were on the assembly ground,
I was very often somewhere on the third floor,
Hiding inside a pile of foams,
Listening to football updates on my portable toshiba radio (which I smuggled through the gate with transparent earphones)
Or when others ate their food in the refectory
I smuggled mine into the hostel,
Just so I could savour the satisfaction of eating my food when others weren't eating (and so they'd beg me and I'd say no)
And when others were in class for prep or studies
I was usually somewhere in the hostel, or an empty class,
Listening to hip-hop music and sports news — with my transparent earphones plugged into that my portable toshiba radio
Reading stolen sports newspapers (from the library)
Masturbating to magazine cut-out pictures of hot women in bikini (It was a military-style missionary school, they seperated boys and girls — it was like prison, we were man-marked with no space to even talk to girls, we could see, but not touch.... they left us no choice, so at the time, jerking off seemed like a genius idea)
Playing table soccer or socks ball...
Or anything to pass time.
I Hated tucking in my shirts or wearing socks or putting on tie (Nobody seems to know why anyone needs to wear a tie?)
Which always got me and my folks in trouble with the teachers
Since we were forced to only eat what the school gave us (60% of the time, the food was small and tasted bad)
We were always sneaking out to the neighbouring village to smuggle in contraband (provisions, palm kernels, fruits and more)
That way — we could eat what we wanted
And no matter what the hostel masters said:
I never really bought into the idea of spending 4 days a week in fellowships where the word of God was a weapon to make you obey everything you were told — with the usual threat of you going to hell fire if you dared question anything...
I'd miss fellowships (by hiding somewhere hidden in the hostel or classroom area)
I've never really liked rules (99% of rules are pointless and are routinely broken by those who set them)
For example, back in boarding school
The rule was every student only eats from the refectory
But the director's children got special treatment
They ate different food
Never slept in the hostel
Never participated in sanitation or labour
And very often got away with a lot of rubbish that other students were severely punished
The joke was on us
The point is, I just hate being told how to run my life
Or that things MUST be done a certain way
I like to go with what makes sense (to me)
Even if everyone else says it's stupid
When it comes to Copywriting...
I had to learn the hard way that there are certain rules you can't disregard
Else — nobody will read what you're writing
And as a result, nobody will buy what you're selling
Which actually translates to:
You won't make any money
And on that basis,
Here's a few Copywriting rules I live by:
- The 1st rule of Copywriting: You, the Copywriter, are irrelevant (Craig Clemens, 2 days ago on Twitter):
Fuck what you think, the market is never wrong.
Keep your fingers on the pulse of the market, And always write based on what the market is saying "right now"
Not what you "think"
- Don't underestimate the intelligence of your reader
Never assume your reader is stupid
- Keep it simple: Make it easy for her to understand everything you're saying — but keep it interesting enough so she strongly desires whatever it is you're selling
- Keep it believable — people who don't believe don't buy
- Tell your reader exactly what you want her to do — and exactly how she should go about it — hold her by the hand and lead her through every step. Never assume she knows what to do.
- And so on...
There's more of course
And I'd probably give you 50 more — if I wasn't in such a hurry to finish this and move on to the next thing on my to-do list
But the little I've shared should give you a little nudge in the right direction.